Came from: The Transylvania Forest 

Current home: An English forest  

Age: “A lady never tells her centuries.”

Relationship Status: Dumped and broken-hearted (“Boys are dumb.”)

Hobbies: Bowling. Zip Lining. Stamp Collecting.

Favourite TV: Partridge Family reruns, the Smurfs (they’re blue like I am!), and Wheel of Fortune (Pat Sajak is hot!)

Likes: Tequila. Home-brew. Noodles.

Dislikes: Boys. Well, one in particular.

Allergies: Cats (especially black ones). Boys. Well, one in particular.

Phobias: Spiders. Spiders. And spiders. Ew. Also the dark (Shhhh! Don’t tell anyone! It’ll ruin my image!). Creepy-looking trees. Paper clips.

Favourite Food: Braised Bat (Oh, I miss it so much now that I’ve had to become vegan!)

Favourite Vegan Food: (Insert blank stare here)

Not-So-Secret-Crush: Simon Cowell

Secret Weapon: My Happy Zappy Socks

What’s Your Story? I’ll tell you all about it here!

Originally published on Facebook and Patreon 2019